Apparently I’ve Gone Insane
So, I’ve given up eating meat during lent, and by meat, I mean animal parts. Eggs are ok (since they are unfertilized eggs, and thus, not an animal) and dairy is ok. But, seafood is not ok.
Why did I do this, you may be asking, since I’m renowned for my love of pork. Well, I wanted to see if I have control over my desires. Or, do my desires control me.
Now, I know that a lot of people will want to turn it into a religious matter. I’m not doing this to get a religious revelation. That seems awfully presumptuous to me. That’s like saying, I want to get closer to God on my terms.
God, here is my plan of how I want my religious experience to unfold. I’m going to fast, and then, I’ll be tempted, and then, I’ll pray, and then, You give me strength, and then, I’ll think I’ve got it conquered, but then, I’ll be too proud, and so, I’ll break, and there will be crying, but then, You’ll pick me up, and then, I’ll realize that You love me, and then, I’ll realize that I can’t do anything without You. This is how I want my lent experience to unfold. Make that happen, ok? Don’t forget the crying part.
Contrived much? Watch a lot of Hallmark movies?
My purpose is less grand. I have a far simpler goal. I just want to learn something about myself. And God willing, He’ll open my eyes so that I can learn it.
February 7th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
good insight. i like how you informed God of your contrived plan. i’m doing alright with abstaining from sodas and milk tea (first 2 days). i confess that i had beef jerky for breakfast this morning…
February 7th, 2008 at 4:36 pm
In my opinion, it’s only contrived if I have a desired outcome in mind, and I want God to deliver that outcome.
I don’t think it’s contrived to say, “I’m going to read this book. I hope I learn something.” It would be contrived to say, “I’m going to read this book, and from my reading it, I’m going to be closer to God.”